Comments for The Gift of Good Manners http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com Advice and Tips for Parents from The Emily Post Institute Tue, 10 Aug 2010 00:43:42 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 Comment on Talking to Your Child About the BP Oil Spill by Canadian Coinage http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1026&cpage=1#comment-4918 Canadian Coinage Tue, 10 Aug 2010 00:43:42 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1026#comment-4918 people were battling this over at the loots forum. it was starting to turn out to be a messy discussion. people were battling this over at the loots forum. it was starting to turn out to be a messy discussion.

]]> Comment on Why Do We Learn Table Manners? by kokoshako http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=273&cpage=1#comment-4566 kokoshako Wed, 04 Aug 2010 12:16:38 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=273#comment-4566 thankssss for the tip thankssss for the tip

]]> Comment on The Etiquette Business – Challenge Number 4 by Cindy Post Senning http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1060&cpage=1#comment-4487 Cindy Post Senning Mon, 02 Aug 2010 22:08:45 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1060#comment-4487 Hello Lynda, I do think etiquette camps and classes are a productive way to help kids learn some manners. However, they really won't do much good unless the parents are invested in continuing the lessons at home. A one shot deal just won't do it as good manners are habits that take practice and repetition to develop. For the most part, these habits are developed in the home and instruction (either in school or in out-of-school programs) reinforces and validates teaching that happens at home. If the parents think it's a good idea and are interested in following up at home, your offer is both kind and generous. I hope it works out for this family. Cindy Post Senning Hello Lynda,

I do think etiquette camps and classes are a productive way to help kids learn some manners. However, they really won’t do much good unless the parents are invested in continuing the lessons at home. A one shot deal just won’t do it as good manners are habits that take practice and repetition to develop. For the most part, these habits are developed in the home and instruction (either in school or in out-of-school programs) reinforces and validates teaching that happens at home. If the parents think it’s a good idea and are interested in following up at home, your offer is both kind and generous. I hope it works out for this family.

Cindy Post Senning

]]> Comment on The Etiquette Business – Challenge Number 4 by Lynda LaFon http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1060&cpage=1#comment-4341 Lynda LaFon Fri, 30 Jul 2010 22:12:58 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1060#comment-4341 My two tween daughters and I went to dinner at a friend's house a few days ago, and from the time we walked in the door, until we left an hour and a half later, we were all very uncomfortable. These friends have 5 children, and we have witnessed the difficulty they have dealing with them in public situations. Experiencing them at home explained why they are unruly. In their home, there are no rules and manners are nonexistent. They told me that they want their children to be able to be comfortable in their own home so they let them live "freely". In my opinion, this is doing a disservice to the kids. They all have difficulty with behavior in school and some of our mutual friends discourage their children from being around these kids. I tried to explain to my friend, the mother, that everyone would feel more comfortable with some manners. She admitted she doesn't invite people over because of the children's behavior. We have a mutual friend from church who has developed a program for teaching manners (TheEtiquetteFactory.com). She offers workshops and tools to teach children manners and even offers a program for schools to use to teach etiquette. I have encouraged my friend to allow her children to attend, and have even offered to fund the two older children (9 and 11 years old) in a summer program she offers. Do you think this is a productive way for the children to attain some kind of manners? Or is it more productive for parents to teach their own children? These parents have good manners themselves...they just don't teach their kids. My two tween daughters and I went to dinner at a friend’s house a few days ago, and from the time we walked in the door, until we left an hour and a half later, we were all very uncomfortable. These friends have 5 children, and we have witnessed the difficulty they have dealing with them in public situations. Experiencing them at home explained why they are unruly. In their home, there are no rules and manners are nonexistent. They told me that they want their children to be able to be comfortable in their own home so they let them live “freely”.

In my opinion, this is doing a disservice to the kids. They all have difficulty with behavior in school and some of our mutual friends discourage their children from being around these kids. I tried to explain to my friend, the mother, that everyone would feel more comfortable with some manners. She admitted she doesn’t invite people over because of the children’s behavior.

We have a mutual friend from church who has developed a program for teaching manners (TheEtiquetteFactory.com). She offers workshops and tools to teach children manners and even offers a program for schools to use to teach etiquette. I have encouraged my friend to allow her children to attend, and have even offered to fund the two older children (9 and 11 years old) in a summer program she offers.

Do you think this is a productive way for the children to attain some kind of manners? Or is it more productive for parents to teach their own children? These parents have good manners themselves…they just don’t teach their kids.

]]> Comment on Too Sweet or not to sweet by ADHDmamma http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=913&cpage=1#comment-3916 ADHDmamma Tue, 20 Jul 2010 18:19:32 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=913#comment-3916 I had a very strict and old fashioned teacher in elementary school. She even corrected our grammar if we said something wrong when answering questiones, something no other teacher did. We both respected her, and was a little bit scared I remember. But, she was also the one that taught us the most! How? Every time we had small test, "word-bingo" or other games the winners would get a choice of sticker from a "huge" (in our view) bag with all sorts of stickers. Also, anyone that hadn't won a game or gotten 100% on a test for the last 3 times got a sticker! So, we were both eager to get a sticker each time, but never left out. Thinking back I'm pretty sure she knew we sometimes tricked her to get a sticker after only 2 tests/games as well ;) Stickers come in all varieties, so there would always be something for every kind of cultural or religious background. She even had letters, and then we got to choose 2-3 ones. I had a very strict and old fashioned teacher in elementary school. She even corrected our grammar if we said something wrong when answering questiones, something no other teacher did. We both respected her, and was a little bit scared I remember. But, she was also the one that taught us the most! How?

Every time we had small test, “word-bingo” or other games the winners would get a choice of sticker from a “huge” (in our view) bag with all sorts of stickers. Also, anyone that hadn’t won a game or gotten 100% on a test for the last 3 times got a sticker!

So, we were both eager to get a sticker each time, but never left out. Thinking back I’m pretty sure she knew we sometimes tricked her to get a sticker after only 2 tests/games as well ;)

Stickers come in all varieties, so there would always be something for every kind of cultural or religious background. She even had letters, and then we got to choose 2-3 ones.

]]> Comment on Talking to Your Child About the BP Oil Spill by Libby Schleichert http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1026&cpage=1#comment-3763 Libby Schleichert Fri, 16 Jul 2010 15:42:18 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1026#comment-3763 Hi Cindy, I enjoyed your blog and think your approach here makes great sense. Thanks for your mention of our Website, as well. An environmental disaster of this magnitude is tough for us adults to wrap our brains around, let alone trying to explain it to children! In any case, the staff at Ranger Rick appreciate bloggers like you who support our work. With warmest wishes, Libby Schleichert, Sr. Editor Ranger Rick Magazine National Wildlife Federation Reston, Virginia Follow me on Twitter: @epschleichert See our Website: www.nwf.org/rangerrick Hi Cindy,
I enjoyed your blog and think your approach here makes great sense.
Thanks for your mention of our Website, as well. An environmental disaster of this magnitude is tough for us adults to wrap our brains around, let alone trying to explain it to children!

In any case, the staff at Ranger Rick appreciate bloggers like you who support our work.

With warmest wishes,
Libby Schleichert, Sr. Editor
Ranger Rick Magazine
National Wildlife Federation
Reston, Virginia

Follow me on Twitter: @epschleichert
See our Website: http://www.nwf.org/rangerrick

]]> Comment on Birthday Parties: A training ground by thank you jay http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1006&cpage=1#comment-3187 thank you jay Tue, 29 Jun 2010 13:19:40 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1006#comment-3187 i like that alot and i agree!!! i like that alot and i agree!!!

]]> Comment on Too Sweet or not to sweet by Lott http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=913&cpage=1#comment-3137 Lott Sat, 26 Jun 2010 19:35:52 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=913#comment-3137 Offering candy as a reward for getting 100% on a test is a bribe. Why aren't we teaching our children that doing their best and getting the best grade they can is the highest reward - and the most enduring. A life lesson would be to teach them that their grades are directly related to their efforts and their dedication to learning, and that a good grade IS the reward. This would instill in them a sense of accomplishment, self-confidence and independence which cannot be taken away and does not diminish with time. Thank you. Offering candy as a reward for getting 100% on a test is a bribe. Why aren’t we teaching our children that doing their best and getting the best grade they can is the highest reward – and the most enduring. A life lesson would be to teach them that their grades are directly related to their efforts and their dedication to learning, and that a good grade IS the reward. This would instill in them a sense of accomplishment, self-confidence and independence which cannot be taken away and does not diminish with time. Thank you.

]]> Comment on My Privilege by Cindy Post Senning http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=974&cpage=1#comment-3019 Cindy Post Senning Sun, 20 Jun 2010 00:59:53 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=974#comment-3019 Dear Melissa, Thank you for your kind words. I completely agree with you when you say that both our mothers would want us to carry on the wonderful work they taught us. So - let us carry on. I also send to you my heartfelt sympathy on the loss of your mother. She clearly had a loving daughter and I know that was a blessing to her. With very best wishes, Cindy Post Senning Dear Melissa,

Thank you for your kind words. I completely agree with you when you say that both our mothers would want us to carry on the wonderful work they taught us. So – let us carry on.
I also send to you my heartfelt sympathy on the loss of your mother. She clearly had a loving daughter and I know that was a blessing to her.

With very best wishes,
Cindy Post Senning

]]> Comment on Birthday Parties: A training ground by Birthday Party Invitations Cards for Surpise Party and All Other Type Party « Wedding Invitationscard http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1006&cpage=1#comment-2848 Birthday Party Invitations Cards for Surpise Party and All Other Type Party « Wedding Invitationscard Sat, 12 Jun 2010 01:54:49 +0000 http://www.thegiftofgoodmanners.com/?p=1006#comment-2848 [...] Birthday Parties: A training ground « The Gift of Good Manners [...] [...] Birthday Parties: A training ground « The Gift of Good Manners [...]

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